Condition. A Serious Condition

I believe sex is an inevitable part of human biology, without which there won’t be any reproduction. Teenage is hard and very difficult to cross by. I just don’t get it…people from everywhere in the globe graduate post graduate or even drop out of college. Although some buddies don’t even get the basic education to fulfill their desires and yet they still live .The fact I don’t get is that even if the students have a difficult time during college they cross the barriers and with fantastic marvel they cross. Yes I got stuck for a moment I typed  116 words up until now and I just lack creative writing even though a “promising” final year graduate, oh yeah right :P .Ah just can’t think much, speechless as some may say in a public speech or type-less as I’m currently typing right now. The inner I is prompting to say FUCK!!!

Restless, arrogant, stupid, foolish, numb thinking of all the words which best suits me and hah yes as you are thinking right now “what the fuck is he trying to say”? Listening to some random Mozart Beethoven Vivaldi shit I’m just not satisfied with myself. Is this a condition or is this a serious condition. Voices inside my head says “yeah, he should read this, she should read this or somebody from the third gender read this and yes please feedback by reading a useless worthless piece of paper with English grammar and pronunciations properly edited using Office Suite 2013 .Yes make up my mind finish what you were trying to express. What you have started should be brought to an end by you. May the unseen thrust upon me his BLESSINGS!!!

Can this be published? Are the contents valid? Will the DMCA pass me from copyrights, wait there’s nothing I have stolen. It’s just genuine. It’s just the simple me. It’s just too hard to explain. It’s just complicated. Emotions of anger, faith and depression portrayed in three paragraphs. Just trying to evaluate myself .Should correct myself there is no Google auto-correct. I have seen people like me they talk they express they write they type and they are all unique. They are my fellow human beings, all look the same with different soul. You may get a slight feel of comfort after expressing yourself to something. But in the end being with somebody close is comforting rather than being alone or the other way around by being lonely to oneself and comforting with the inner “I“ self. It’s just a damn big question whether “to be or not to be that is the question”. Thank you Shakespeare.

I Believe I Can Fly

Suddenly I woke up and realized I was stranded in an empty space way in between the clouds. I could see the clouds running by my side. Utter silence not pin drop of voice heard. My mind started to make those so called “soul voice”. He said “where in the fucking world am I”? And I echoed the same phrase “where in the fucking world am I? “.

The world I woke up was a different one. People: nowhere to be found. Animals: none to be seen. And I wondered why I was not breathing. I felt my heart beat and it seems dead. No anxiety. No BP. No stress. I worried about nothing. Am I dead? It seems so. But I didn’t have the feeling I was. What next? I looked in every direction. What the holy book taught me was to search for God. I started walking but to where and for what purpose. I realized the difference between heaven and hell was not valid here .The sensation of fear was long gone. Does this mean that I am free?

I cried out loud “help! Help! Somebody please help me…” Wait why am I crying? There is nothing to be cried out for. I am not in any danger. The earthly words I used was useless here. Then how will I communicate. The definition: for an effective communication to take place there should be a medium and receiver on the other end. But in this place where is the medium where is the receiver? And where is the other end? I tried to close my eyes and tried to make myself unconscious. No stop!!! Why can’t you be here? It’s a different place. It’s a different experience. It’s good.

Does being here make me happy? Why am I not getting any emotions? Completely lost. It’s not drugs .It’s not divine. It’s not creativity. Then what is it. I was asking too many questions to myself. Maybe I should keep quiet. I decided to meditate for some time. I crossed my legs closed my eyes stretched my arm’s sat erect and searched for something. It took me to a psychic stage. I was losing control of myself. Falling into a hollow that didn’t seemed to have a way back. I was flying. No I saw myself flying through the reflection. The reflection scattered and I land my head on the ground first. I was back!!!

Reality was painful. Hitting the forehead on the ground was the first. But more pain struck as I looked back at the things that went by and the things that was to come. Shit… but yes shit happens and living through all those shit is the purpose of life. Earthy morals and beliefs came back to me. Nothing much to be said about the real world. Those 7 hours seemed like 7 minutes but it was one of the best sleep I ever had. I wished I could sleep for eternity like that. I hope science could take me to that cryogenic stage.

 Lot of thinking got me to the answer … BELIEF … BELIEVE … FAITH … HOPE …. My unconscious took me there, because he believed .And like him if I believed I could be there. Stop this writing and starting believing. Believe me reader, believing does make a change.

SENSE OF RELIEF

I WAS WALKING THROUGH THE JUNGLE
SUDDENLY THE FOG SURROUNDED
I COULD SEE NOTHING
I HAD A COLD SENSATION
SOMETHING MAGICAL WAS GOING TO HAPPEN

IT WAS THE GHOST
HE OR SHE, I DIDN'T KNOW
BUT IT HAD SOMETHING IN ITS HAND
I ASKED WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?
IT HANDED A SCROLL
WITH SOME NAMES SEEN
ME???

I FELT NUMB FOR SOME SEC
WAS IT THE TIME FOR ME TO GO?
I ASKED AGAIN 
WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?
POINTING ITS FINGER-LIKE GESTURE 
TOWARDS ME!!!

I CLOSED MY EYES AND OPENED
I COULD SEE PEOPLE WHO LOVED ME
I SAID TO IT GO BACK FROM WHERE YOU CAME 

AND COME WHEN THERE IS NO ONE LEFT IN THE WORLD 

WHO LOVED ME...